Here are just a bunch of random items/links/what-have-you that have been jostling around my head over the past couple days:
I actually ran across this a couple weeks ago and laughed my ass off, but then I forget about it until I saw Wonkette had linked to it. It's a mock profile by commercial director Russell Bates apparently for Comedy Central of someone named "Harlan McCraney" (portrayed by Andy Dick). McCraney is the man apparently responsible for all of President Bush's linguistic screw-ups. You see, it's all perfectly choreographed because, as McCraney says in the video, "The American people of today's Americas want a politician who can speak their language and speak it badly." The video is absolutely hysterical. Check-it-out. (Update: Shocker, I'm only eight months behind. Lindsay had this back in December.)
I suppose it only makes sense. Seacrest OUT! moves closer to his ultimate dream. Maybe MTV should produce New Year's Rockin' Eve on behalf of ABC since this version might as well be an episode of Becoming. Ryan, I've watched Dick Clark; I've screamed from the street at Dick Clark; Dick Clark was ... well, he wasn't a friend of mine, but he's been around forever and looks not so much older than you. Ryan Seacrest: you're no Dick Clark.
Anyone else wondering what it is that makes Ben Affleck think he can write a whole TV series on his own? (sub'n req'd.) According to the Variety story, the series is called Resistance and it "will be set in the not-so-distant future, imagining a United States that's been divided into separate countries following a pair of catastrophic terror attacks." The cast will be a bunch of people trying to reunify the country. The story goes on to say, "One person familiar with the pitch said the show ultimately will be a hopeful hour because of its pro-democracy bent." Sure, who doesn't love a pro-democracy bent. But won't the tireless hours of TV writing and production take away from Benny becoming a good daddy? And you just know this show will get picked-up by some network to terrorize viewers for an episode or two before execs are reminded that the name Affleck actually isn't such a big draw after all.
I know this is from last week but Bill what the hell are you thinking?!?! If you don't want to do a third Ghostbusters fine, but the first Garfield movie was so horrible, please don't lend your name and cache -- which I'm sure Fox is depending upon before giving the goa head -- to a sequel. Nobody needs that.
And finally, I suppose now that TV Newser has suspended its waterfall of "Remembering Peter Jennings" tributes and posts, ABC News has decided it's time to take his name off the program as well. The only reason this is strange news is because they made such a big to-do last week about how the program would remain ABC World News Tonight with Peter Jennings for the foreseeable future. I suppose it was a nice honor -- although also a little creepy, actually -- to leave his name on the show for the rest of last week, but why not decide then that it would be the remainder of the week and then off. It hasn't been that long and to suddenly now decide, "It's time," is just bizarre.
Meanwhile, if you didn't catch the Remembering Peter Jennings broadcast ABC News produced last week, you missed out. It was really a wonderful tribute, presented in the same distinguished and elegant yet straightforward style of the man it honored. ABC dedicated two commercial-free hours to what essentially amounted to a big thank you, and if it hadn't been for The Walt Disney Company's annoying and callous intrusions, that really amounted to commercials saying, "Hey, we own ABC, and we want you to know we're really sad, and thanks Peter," that would repeat between segments roughly every 20 minutes, it would have been perfect. In fact, it's a bit shocking that Disney would have placed such a demonstrative memorial commercial -- the company name had its own solo title card that faded into black and the bumper is accompanied by somber narration -- considering that they generally offer very classy "In Memoriam" ads in the trades when industry vets die. It would have been much nicer and more subtle had they simply transferred these trade ads -- which usually simply have the person's name, dates of birth and death, and then a picture of Mickey sulking with a tear falling from his eye -- to a brief, silent, 15 second card appearing on screen. It doesn't matter that Jennings was a newsman and Mickey a cartoon. That would have been a just memorial from ABC's corporate parent. Instead, it was all about Walt Disney Co. bringing attention to itself and how gracious it is to dedicate this valuable airtime.
And you wonder why people hate Michael Eisner and Bob Iger.